D of E

EXPEDITION REPORTS

Day 2 – The day we couldn't find the toilet of the dammed

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TROUSER LEGS

HOPE CHURCH

Next morning we woke up early and began to prepare our morning porridge, to our amusement Scott and James were still sleeping even though Ben and I were making lots of noise and we had already stuck our head in the tent to make sure they were awake. They claimed no knowledge of this and I didn't use my alarm so they just slept through. The porridge had a sort of strong adhesive taste and it stuck to the mess tins well. Although with some carefully sort out hot water it was a breeze to wash off.

At about 9 ish we set off and merrily made are way down and through Hope cracking random jokes about the current town. None of which are relevant to the hike but when you sat down and thought about it, it made little to no sense at all. The route to and over the river was a long and arduous one that took all of an hour from hope and hardly seemed worthy of being put into the project but randomly came up as a subject so I thought inclined to add it. (In other words it's a waste of space).

As the morning progressed, our route to the railway was made harder by the fact that much of the fields surrounding us were fenced off. David had the delight (struggle) of getting through. The railway path was not made any easier due to the fact the route under it was slightly flooded (about up to shin height of water) but proved little problem to get through.

A FARM

Our struggle so far was not rewarded as we were blessed with another big hill (to everyone else joy Daniel said he might climb it although regretted this comment with plenty of fowl obscenities that cannot be repeated). Most of the way up everyone started feeling the urge for a quick break and while resting we got a great view of the local area (+ a few local girls as well). Our desperate up hill struggle prevailed only for us to be condemned to not be on our way down (yet).

The ridge kept appearing on the horizon but we finally had to go down hill into a forest with a strong group of cyclists in tow. The route probably was not the best for them as there were rocks and holes covering the path down making it impossible to ride on.

THE VIEW OVER THE FOREST

As we came off the main path to take a shortcut through the forest we were amazed to find a sheepskin with skull still attached and two thoughts popped to my mind. Which group member was small enough to use it as a Halloween costume (BEN) and does this forest contain wolfs or do they live in the fields. We finally got to the bottom followed by a group of ramblers who got to take a long break on a bridge but we continued our quest to find the ultimate place to stop for lunch. After the boss ladies sirs agreed where we were going to stop me and Ben working on their best estimates sought out a good route up to where I though we were heading.

After an extended 10 minutes and brief stupid questions " are we there yet, I'm hungry, I wanna rest, I wanna drink, where are we stopping again, weren't we meant to stop there, that sign post with big black letters saying electrified, it isn't really they just do it to keep dumb people in" and finally "stop guys stop is she fit or is she fit? core she's the fittest 182 yrs old tree I've ever seen". Finally after what seemed all of 20 minutes (took all of 15) we found a great place to stop relax and enjoy some quality peanut butter pita breads.

While resting, I got the great chance to laugh at the ramblers slowly trudging there way up the hill and enjoy the great scenery and some young blondes walking only a short distance from where we were sitting.

DECENDING TO THE RESERVOIR

WALKING DOWN THE ROAD

Day 2 afternoon!!!

After lunch we put our packs on and checked our compass (compai? There was more than one). After the check we set of down the comfortably walkable footpath. We were walking along the footpath and, after about 1k I was nominated as the navigator. I glimpsed down at the map with a mental note “Onwards to the north…” I went to check the compass and realised the compass I had been given in the morning was no longer around my neck. Here is how it happened.

(Flashback of compass sitting on a footpath marker by lunch stop)

Ben: So… Who picked up my compass
All: What compass? ... *Evil looks* … Ben? Where did you put it! … You gonna’ dieeee!!!
Ben: (Unrepeatable gibberish cursing)

BY THE RESERVOIR

Following that small dialogue I sprinted the Half-K back to the lunch stop and found Mr. Compass safe and sound having a small nap. Then I sprinted all the way back to find the rest of the group resting. I wasn’t allowed a rest! After that little incident I was sworn to secrecy on punishment of death. If any of the people in charge read this I am probably already dead. Next on our agenda was the decent down the hill. We had to change our route slightly as we noticed we were being trailed by enemy agents (actually the footpath was closed, but that sounded less cool). We walked down the road a while next to the damn. Unfortunately we never found the toilet of the damned. It is likely that we walked past it in our rush to get off the feet-butchering road. We had to go on for a (depressing) descent down a hill to cross a river and walk all the way back up the other side. Most of the rest of the walk was boring. I forgot what we did. I remember walking through forest ..? Wait… I remember. Next we walked through the village of hope. We had to make as many hope jokes as possible (‘we left hope behind us’ & ‘there’s still hope’) Then, to the best of my memory, we finished the hike.

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